Monday, July 21, 2008

Open Letter to "J"

If you're reading this, I'm so sorry to hear the news of your miscarriage. It's not even remotely fair and I'm angry for you just thinking about it. I'm thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers. If you ever want to talk, please don't hesitate to call. I don't know if you've "nested" at all but I wanted to include the Nest's pregnancy loss board. It's an extremely supportive group of women. Maybe you'll want to visit or maybe not. Either way, I just wanted to be sure you knew about it.

http://boards.thenest.com/boards/ShowForum.aspx?ForumID=426&MsdVisit=1

I also wanted to post some blogs for you. This is the be-all-end-all list of blogs that are everything fertility related, categorized no less. Maybe someone else's voice can offer some small sense of solace.

http://stirrup-queens.blogspot.com/2006/06/whole-lot-of-blogging-brought-to-you.html

For anybody else reading this, if you could leave some thoughts, prayers, dust or juju for "J", please do. Thanks.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey Jacki,
Maybe this is all a coincidence that my name starts with a J and someone we both know turned me onto your blog... (which I have been following faithfully)...and my current situation just HAPPENS to fall into what you write about in this entry........but your sister's words have been echoing in my head for days now that NOTHING is a coincidence. So here I am, a virtual stranger that met you for one brief, fleeting moment over a year ago, and I just want to say thank you. I am touched...beyond words. Thanks for the links, but more importantly, thank YOU. Not much makes any sense these days, but it is moments like this....turning on my computer, deciding to check in on Ms. JackiJaguar (love it, by the way...very clever) and seeing the letter to J. that makes me realize that i will make it. One way or another. And like your sister has been teaching me, there is always something larger going on...something that I have no control over....and I just have to trust- and believe that nothing is a coincidence.

-J-

JackiJaguar said...

Hi J,
MB's right, it's no coincidence. Hang in there. You're right, you will make it. I'm thinking of you and praying for you.
~Jacki

Monica said...

I'm sorry you are going through this, J. I hope that healing and peace find you soon. If anyone at the nest can help you feel a little less sad or a little less alone - we are only a post away.

shawnandlarissa said...

J-
I don't know you, but you'll be in my prayers. I am so sorry for your loss.
-Larissa (smilelari)

Jennifer said...

J- Add me to the list of internet strangers who wish the very best for you and are sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.

Callie said...

J,
You don't know me but my heart is breaking for you. There is nothing worse than the loss of a child and I truly wish that no one ever had to feel that pain. Know that there are people out there supporting you.

Mrs White

mrsblondies said...

J-
You don't know me but I'm so sorry that you are having to go through this. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

ajk said...

J,
I'm very sorry for your loss. I will be sure to keep you in my prayers.

~Amy (ajk612)

iHikeandRun said...

J, I've never experienced a loss but I can imagine how isolating it can be. The Nest is an invaluable respite for loneliness for those of us who don't feel like we can speak openly to people IRL (in real life) about our pain.

(hikerbride07)

manatee said...

J,
I am so sorry for your loss. Although I have never met you, you are in my heart and thoughts.
~Jennifer

Stephanie said...

J,
I am so very sorry for your loss. My heart aches for you and I know the pain of losing a baby too well. In the beginning, I really felt like nothing would ever be ok again. I cried gut wrenching sobs for hours on end, the pain just would not leave. Everyone kept telling me time would heal me, and I hated hearing that. I felt like I'd never be the same. I'm not sure where you are in your grief journey, but I just wanted to put my feelings out there so you know you aren't alone. Now it has been a little over 2 months since our baby girl Hope went up to heaven, and I can say I do feel different than I did in the beginning. I'm not 'better', my heart is still wounded, and it will never really heal. I know Jacki mentioned the pregnancy loss board on the nest, I'm on there every day. It is a group of women who are going through losses too, and the support there is amazing. Just know that there are many hearts out there hurting and aching just like yours, women who you can vent to or cry to or complain to when you need it without being judged or worrying about how you feel. YOu can feel however you want to right now. I want you to know you are in my prayers and thoughts. Sending lots of ((((HUGS)))) your way. There are also some books I've found really helpful...so I thought I'd share those titles with you. One is called Grieving the Child I Never Knew...this book got me through some of my darkest days. The other is called Empty Cradle, Broken Heart.
~Stephanie~

amy said...

J,

I am sorry for your loss. I will not pretend to know how you feel, as I have never experienced this pain. Just know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

True Companions Plus One? said...

Hi J - I don't know you either, but I, too, wanted to say that I am sorry. I have never been through what you're going through right now, but I really wish that no one ever did. Please know you and your family are in our thoughts.
Marcy