Somewhere in Cincinnati, there is the Pampers headquarters.
And somewhere in the Pampers headquarters, there is the design department.
And somewhere in the design department, there is a 21 year old guy.
And he is laughing at me.
BabyJaguar, being the husky little beast that he is, has been in the size 3 Pampers for a while now. And the size 3s present a new challenge. Rogue Elmo. I previously referred to him as Wandering Elmo but, as time goes on, I find him to be more menacing hence the name change.
There is where the 21 year old guy comes into the picture. He's clearly new to the job, has no children of his own and likes to stir up trouble. Because he has made the decision that on some of the size 3s, Elmo will be on the front. And on others, the back. Elmo now shows up in different places and different sizes just to mess with me.
How do I know he's a 21 year, childless man? Because no mother in her right mind would start screwing around with new, exhausted moms in the middle of the night who are changing their children in the semi-dark by placing Rogue Elmo in different places all over the diaper. This is exactly how new, exhausted moms put their children in diapers backwards.
Damn you, Elmo. Damn you.
And 21 year old, childless, new guy. I will find you. One day....I will find you.